Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Hanging Out Alone: Is Going to the Movies and Out to Dinner By Yourself a Loser Move?

I like watching the repeats of old shows. The show Eve is still shown on TvOne from time to time and I used to love this show when it first came on back in 2003 which of course features the rapper Eve.


Below is the episode I recently watched called "Self Helpless" from episode 2 that originally aired in 2004. This episode is after Shelly (Eve) and J.T.'s (Jason Winston George) breakup.

The character Shelly tries to cope with being alone after her breakup and she reads a self-help book which encourages her to spend more time by herself.

This episode is funny to me because of how she is treated in the restaurant for eating alone which gave me the idea of this post.

I remember when I was a server a couple of years ago, hosts were told by my old manager not  to greet a party of one by saying, "Just one?" as it may make them feel like a loser for eating alone. And in this episode, the people in the restaurant kind of treated Shelly in a way to remind her that she was dining alone.
Watch below as Shelly tries to get over her breakup by spending time alone:



Is there a need to hang out with a group of people or grab a buddy to go to a restaurant or even to the movies? I've never been to the movies alone but does it make someone a loser for going solo?

I have one friend who catches only the matinees when going to the movies alone. She says she wouldn't be caught dead going by herself during the busy nights on the weekends. I'm guessing she would feel awkward or embarrased? So do solo movie watchers tend to go to the movies only at a certain time? During the day?

I've been to a restaurant by myself and I must admit it was kind of lonely and awkward at first, just sitting there and not having someone to interact with.

I went to Red Lobster alone and wondered since it was just me should I sit at the bar, but instead I got a table. As I looked around, everyone else had someone to talk to. I actually paid attention to the details of the restaurant, the servers, studied the menu and heard the different noises in the background. When going out to eat with a group of people you tend to not really focus on these things. 

I also found myself texting a lot and going on the internet on my cellphone to seem busy at times because I didn't have a book or newspaper to read. I was happy when the server would come to my table. When you're in a group or out on a date, sometimes it seems like the server is interrupting your conversation, but they're just checking on you.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with spending time alone. Sometimes "You" time is what everyone needs, instead of constantly being surrounded by a crew.

There are some things I actually rather do alone like; studying, when I was in college (was never much of a group person), going to the gym sometimes, shopping and going to the spa. If I need to clear my head I will even go to the beach by myself.

I just thought about concerts...okay that I would need some company.

If I wanted to go to the movies and noone was available to go, I would totally head to the movies alone...and I would go during the night on the weekend...so what. But it just so happens that I always have a movie buddy.

Eating alone was a different experience for me and if you haven't tried it, then try it and don't feel like you'll waste table space in the restaurant for eating by yourself. You deserve a table!

And a side note to the servers out there: stop looking at the 'table of one' as no money. You'll be surprised at how much some of the solo people tip when you treat them nicely and show a little interest in actually doing your job.

2 comments:

  1. I will have to say it is NOT a loser move. I have been to the movies alone AND breakfast (IHOP), lunch and dinner. Sometimes I want to do something and want to be alone to be in my own thoguhts and not be bothered with anyone else. OR I really want to go and can't find anyone to go with me. I went to see Transformers 3 alone (the 1st time) and did not care who else went because it was about the movie, not who I went with. I was going to enjoy it anyway. It also depends on your attitude. If you go out alone and LOOK like you are depressed and lonely...yea you are a loser. Stay in the house, don't spread your misery to the world!

    ReplyDelete
  2. LMAO @ "if you are a loser stay in the house!" awww lol

    ReplyDelete

Add your comments and thoughts below and click 'subscribe by email' button to receive follow up responses and other comments on this post.

Blogchives